ALTONA, MB

A recent study showed that Friesen was the most common surname in Manitoba, beating out such favourites as Wiebe, Klassen, and even Smith. The study came as no surprise for local meteorologists who have always suspected Friesens were to blame for Manitoba’s harsh winter climate.

“I gotta say, I’m not surprised,” said weatherman Dave Friesen. “Whenever anyone comes to this province they say it’s completely Friesen.”

While the province may not be completely Friesen, it’s more Friesen than most, and that has some locals hatching a plan to warm things up around here.

“Manitoba can’t be Friesen anymore,” said Mrs. Funk. “We’ve got only two possible solutions: make more Funks or kick the Friesens out.”

To address the problem, the province has created a new campaign to Make Manito

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