WASHINGTON, DC — According to sources in the White House, President Biden has been given his very own Weeble-Wobble to help keep him occupied and upright in the months leading up to November's election.

According to White House staffers, Biden's new bottom-heavy outfit was custom-made by Fisher-Price and is completely bullet-proof in addition to being impossible to knock down. It also sports a spiffy new presidential seal on the front.

Sources confirmed that if knocked over, Biden will quickly bounce upright due to the state-of-the-art weeble-wobble design.

"The president is taking a stand for democracy," said Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre as Biden weebled and wobbled behind her. "The right-wing conspiracy theorists who claim that the president is falling down on the job are litera

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