DEAR MISS MANNERS: I’ve seen young men with their mothers picking out a ring that the young woman of his choice is supposed to love and wear forever.

What if they picked something she really didn’t like?

I would like to propose a new tradition: The proposal is made and accepted, but instead of a ring, the proposer offers a jewel box that contains a diamond, or a stone that the newly minted bride-to-be likes, and an appointment time at a jeweler to select the setting that suits the wearer and the proposer’s budget.

The proposer should have already found out what type of stone is desired and the shape of the stone. The proposer can then choose the stone that fits the budget and will please its wearer. Often jewelers allow the stone to be replaced with a larger one and the price is discoun

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