EARTH ORBIT - While it seemed the inauguration of the 46th president went off peacefully, the worst fears of the country manifested as Donald Trump staged a military coup to retain power. Most didn't notice, though, because he did it using the only branch of the military still loyal to him: Space Force.
In a stunning surgical strike led by Space Force Commander Zap Rowsdower, Space Force took over all of space, defeating any resistance there -- of which there was none. There was one Russian on the International Space Station who said, "I don't know about this," but after a stern stare from Rowsdower, he shut up.
"Trump is now president of all of space," declared Rowsdower. "If you think differently, you'll have to come up to space and tell us. Just let it be known we have guns -- a few o