GRETNA, MB

Southern Manitoba’s most popular shopping centre in Gretna, Manitoba has gone to extreme lengths to get rid of the teens who’ve been loitering in the parking lot this spring. To address this problem, the mall has set up larger speakers and are blasting German hymns.

“We’re playing old choir recordings from MCI,” said mall spokesperson Diane Redekop. “That’ll keep the teens away, I’m sure.”

According to the mall, the most effective hymns at scaring away the teens are and

“So some reason, we’ve also had a lot of luck with ,” said Redekop. “I’m glad it works, but I don’t know what they don’t like about it. Maybe the fact it’s missing a guest appearance by rapper NF. Who knows what the kids like these days?”

The plan, it seems, have backfired, however, as the mall now has the p

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