• Gabrielle Anwar was one of Hollywood's most recognizable faces in the 1990s. • She battled undiagnosed bipolar disorder for decades while raising three children. • At 54, she's found healing and purpose through her relationship with her grandchild.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Gabrielle Anwar. It has been edited for length and clarity.

When I look back at old family photo albums, I see a little girl who looks hollow and vacant. I now understand why.

My parents didn't have the tools to help me. Like many from their generation, they lacked the vocabulary and empathy we now have around mental health.

By the time I hit adolescence, I was emotionally unstable. I believe I had my first manic episode around age 11 when I started menstruating. I was expelled from

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