WASHINGTON, D.C. - Justice Clarence Thomas has been rushed to a burn ward in Washington after he scorched his hands writing another "absolutely fire" Supreme Court opinion this morning in the case of New York State Rifle & Pistol Association Inc. v. Bruen, sources at SCOTUS confirmed today.

Thomas suffered the injuries after finalizing his opinion on the Second Amendment gun rights case and submitting it for publication.

"Hmmm, let's see - why don't I write a paragraph pointing out how gun control has been used by racists to keep black people unarmed," the justice muttered to himself, causing his keyboard to begin to glow orange like a hot bed of coals. "Now, I'm just going to absolutely wreck Democrats' argument that the Second Amendment isn't necessary in the 21st century."

Fire th

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