STEINBACH, MB

Mennonite men across North America have joined their non-Mennonite counterparts in staying far far away from the house this evening as millions of women get together to watch the Netflix reboot of ‘Gilmore Girls.’

“I’ve jast got to stay avay from that satuation yat,” said Peter Friesen, a local farmer and husband of an avid Gilmore Girls fan. “I tink I’ll jast malk the cows all evening, whether they need a milking or not.”

For some reason Mennonite men seem to have absolutely no interest in learning what Lorelai and Rory have been up to since the original show was cancelled in 2007.

“Da wife likes dat show more dan she likes rhubarb platz,” said Friesen. “I jast don’t understand womens at all.”

Friesen also complains that, “there’s jast vay too much talking on dat show.

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