YOU will never be of the calibre of a Disney Princess, but you could be the comparatively ugly friend who gets approached because you’re less intimidating. But whose friend?

Are you the princess’s bestie or more of an acquaintance?

A) I’m her most beloved companion and an audience favourite, though sadly excluded from the live-action remake due to cultural insensitivities.

B) I’m the lesser half of a duo whose signature song has left no cultural impact.

C) [Makes indecipherable yet well-animated gestures. Verdict inconclusive.]

Your princess friend is singing a mawkish song about her feelings. How do you react?

A) I interject with hilarious, parent-pleasing wisecracks that will be edited out by Disney+ if they haven’t been already.

B) I act as a sounding board for her most vulnerabl

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