DEAR ABBY: I am a member of a small group of women who have traveled together internationally in the last few years. One person in the group searches for accommodations (which she loves to do). Once we agree on the accommodations, this person books the reservations, and we each pay her our share of the lodging. We book our own flights individually.

I needed to back out of a recent trip due to illness and notified the group three months before the scheduled trip. When I asked the members of the group to refund me the money I had already paid toward accommodations and car rental (close to $800), they refused, saying their expenses were now more than they had planned and it was not their fault that I could not go on the trip. They had a difficult time understanding that I am now subsidizing

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