U.S. — Baseball fans across the country rent their garments and cried out in anguish tonight, asking the Almighty God how long they must suffer after the Los Angeles Dodgers swept the Milwaukee Brewers to once again advance to the World Series.

The nation, which took the Dodgers' victory as further evidence that America continues to live under God's wrathful judgment, lifted up a collective lament to ask the Lord when He would turn away from his anger and strike down the unrighteous.

"How long, O Lord, will the wicked prosper?" one sorrowful fan was heard shouting as he wept. "They pour out arrogant words, all the evildoers boast. They crush other teams, O Lord, and afflict our favorite franchises. When will you let us see your face again, God? When will we be saved from the Dodgers?"

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