GOSHEN, IN - Local dad Fred Mullers has contracted the stomach flu, which, similar to the common cold, is a death sentence for husbands and dads. Knowing he is on death's door, Mullers has written his last will and testament on the bathroom floor.

"I know not how much longer I have to live, dear family," said the pale Mullers to his weeping family. "If the Lord doth see fit to take me home, know that it is his will. Please follow the instructions I have written on the tile floor in Sharpie next to the toilet."

The will was written as follows:

"I, Fred, being of sound mind, do hereby bequeath all my earthly possessions to my dearest wife and darling children.

Please do not mourn me, for I am in the arms of angels being carried to the realms of glory. My suffering is great, for my wife d

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