Key points

“Nexting” is one of your brain’s safety habits.

Learn to bring awareness and clarity to a racing, nexting mind and own the moment instead.

When you listen with full awareness, you then look with clarity and can leap toward what matters now.

One night recently, I “left” my kitchen while still standing in it.

My wife was telling me about some family vexations she’d happened upon during the day. As soon as I heard so-and-so’s name, my survival brain put on its cape. I felt the tiny jaw clench, the microwave hummed like a lie detector, and … poof … I was no longer in my kitchen. I was in the courtroom of my mind delivering a closing argument; and, embarrassingly, also drafting a grocery list. (Eggs. Muffins. Righteous zinger for later.)

If you know that move, you’ve met one of

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