Ladies are always looking to hook up with an eligible Mennonite man. There’s just something about the hands of a man who catches chickens for a living that’s simply irresistible to a lot of gals. In the competitive dating scene of 21st century Rosengart or Gnadenfeld, it’s increasingly important for young women to be able to pick up on any subtle hints that Abe or Corny is just not that into you. The next time you’re out clubbing in jantsied and you see these signs, you’ll know not to waste your time. (You’re too good for him anyway).

He buys you flowers…from the MCC. This is a classic Mennonite man tactic. All the wilted funeral flowers that don’t get buried along with the deceased, get sent to the thrift store where they’re purchased by Mennonite men on first dates. They may smell nice

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