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Welcome to Ella and the City—a new column by Ella Snyder about what it’s like to date as a trans person in New York City today.

Before my gender confirmation surgery (GCS), I never felt comfortable touching myself. Even washing my body in the shower, I’d fill with self-hatred acknowledging my groin area. My penis was never a sex organ to me—it was an unwanted appendage; something that simply didn’t feel right. From the moment I learned having a vagina was an option for me, I knew that it would change my relationship with my body forever.

I first heard about this operation that could fix me, and the anatomy that didn’t feel like my own, when I was 9 years old, in 2008. While watching Kim Petras’ This Morning interview, the show hosts claimed she was the “world’s youngest tra

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