The impulse to help your children never goes away. But when they are independent adults, weighing whether to offer them financial help is not a simple decision. supersizer/E+/Getty Images

Spending the holidays with your adult children and the grandkids?

If so, their futures may be on your mind, especially if you sense – or they just flat-out say – they’re not flush enough to buy a home, put their own kids through school, or pay off big debts they’ve acquired.

As a parent, you may wonder if you should help them or if it makes more sense to stay out of it and leave them money after you die, if that’s an option.

To figure out what is right for you, here are four questions to consider:

1. Can I afford to help?

Think carefully about how much you can comfortably offer.

“It’s understanda

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