Dear Abby: Four months ago, my 15-year-old oldest child was killed in a car accident. It has been really hard. My husband and I are doing our best to take care of our younger children and put our lives back together.

One thing I don’t know what to do about is all the mail I have received from my estranged relatives. None of them came for the service, but aunts, uncles, cousins, and even my dad’s ex-wife wrote cards and condolence letters. It’s all paper mail because I have an unlisted phone number, a private email address, and don’t use social media, so they can’t follow me. There are good reasons why we haven’t been in touch.

I do not have the energy to restart these relationships, especially not now, but I also feel the letters were sent with kind intent and ignoring them would be cold

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