The Wheel of Consent was developed by Dr. Betty Martin. It's an incredibly helpful model for understanding and exploring the subtleties of giving and receiving through mindful action, bringing freedom and integrity into relationships.

In action, it's a little like pressing pause on autopilot and getting curious. What if we didn’t just ask, “Is this OK?” but went deeper: “What do I truly want right now?” “What would feel genuinely good to give?” “Whose pleasure or benefit are we talking about?” These questions can seem simple, but when honest and forthcoming, they open up a surprising amount of freedom.

And yes, as Winnicott reminds us, "It is a joy to be hidden, and a disaster to not be found." There is something deeply thrilling about being pursued or intuited without a word—the hope

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