OGDEN, UT - After a supremely disappointing decision from the Supreme Court, local Christian Paulson McPaully has reported a brief inclination to start placing his hope in God.

"I'm crushed," Paulson told sources. "I gave my everything to the Supreme Court. My votes, my allegiance, and my everlasting hope have for years been dutifully placed at the feet of the nine robed mystics in charge of America's moral law! That they would betray my trust like this is devastating."

Local evangelical pastor Jay Jableeblee also expressed his dismay. "Leading Christian theologians all agree that a conservative Supreme Court majority is the key to spiritual revival in America," he said. "Thousands of pastors and spiritual leaders have been waiting for the Supreme Court to green-light a bold stance again

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