AMARILLO, TX — A group of local friends has recruited a Baptist girl so as to always have a designated driver.

Though not particularly heavy drinkers, the group of reformed evangelicals felt the benefit of always having a guaranteed sober driver was worth adding a Baptist.

"Heck yeah, I'll have another glass of wine. Baptist Anita is here!" said local woman Jessica Barnes. "It's been so handy having a Baptist around. We were getting an Uber one night and we saw this Baptist girl leaving, stone sober, and we thought - hey, why don't we get one of those? We should have added a Baptist years ago. Anita's been a great addition."

According to sources, Anita Vargas was surprised to be approached by the friend group, but has enjoyed getting to know them. "A virgin strawberry daquiri, please,"

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