MORRIS, MB

When southbound traffic on Manitoba’s most prestigious highway Number 75 was re-opened today after being closed briefly due to winter weather, drivers were shocked to discover road conditions were still just as shitty as ever.

“I was trying to visit the in this weekend, but when I saw the condition of that road, I said ‘hang it. I’m staying in Niverville,'” said Mrs. Schellenberg. “And all my cousins understood. These simply aren’t suitable driving conditions.”

Meanwhile the slightly more adventurous Klassen couple decided they just might be able to make it to Altona so long as they took the Hummer.

“Our daughter really didn’t want us to go. She didn’t think it was safe, but I told her if the Lord wanted us to visit Taunte Tina, he would guide our vehicle safely all along th

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