As you know, this election is the most important election in our lifetimes. Experts say it may even be the most important election since the formation of the universe over 6,000 years ago!

Experts also say that if your candidate loses and the other candidate wins, democracy and freedom will be destroyed for all of eternity. The only way to stop the apocalypse is to vote as hard as you can and totally own the other side!

To ensure success on voting day, be sure to follow these important tips:

Call Mark Zuckerberg on the phone to ensure you're at the right voting place.

Binge-watch Sean Hannity and Rachel Maddow the night before so you'll be fully informed.

Look for any candidate with an "R" next to their name and vote for him so Jesus won't cry.

Look for any candidate with a "D" next

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