LOS ANGELES, CA - Tonight's Super Bowl event has been temporarily delayed so LA authorities can clear out a homeless encampment that sprung up overnight on the 50-yard line.

"Unfortunately, we may have to delay the game by 30 or 40 minutes," said a maskless Mayor Eric Garcetti while trying to hold his breath as a big yellow bulldozer demolished a row of tents behind him. "Everything's fine. Nothing to see here! LA is a wonderful place to live!"

Some experts claim that the homelessness epidemic in LA is due to crushing government policies that drive up the cost of living and make owning a home impossible for anyone making less than $12 million per year. Other experts have condemned those first experts as "homelessphobes."

After being cleared from the stadium, the homeless crowd will be

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