NEW YORK, NY

Forbes Magazine has just released a list of the richest oligarchs in America. On the top of the list were beloved American oligarchs Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerburg, and Bill Gates.

“People always look forward to our annual list of American richest and most powerful oligarchs,” said Mr. Forbes. “I think our oligarchs stack up nicely with the best oligarchs in the world.”

The new list created quite the talk around the water cooler, with average Americans debating who their favourite master and overlord was.

“Elon is a bit of a dick, but he’s super smart,” said local woman Anne Thiessen. “On the other hand, sometimes I just like to take a good order from Jeff Bezos.”

America’s oligarchs want everyone to know they’re really nice and generous people and there’s no need

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