PALM BEACH, FL — The Babylon Bee has obtained the inside scoop regarding Donald J. Trump's big upcoming announcement, and is first to report that the 45th President of the United States bowled a perfect 300 in Wii Sports.
This is the biggest news since last year's announcement that Trump had scored a double-eagle in Mario Golf: Super Rush.
"I'm making a huge announcement today, absolutely huge," reads the announcement leaked exclusively to The Babylon Bee as a show of gratitude for publishing real news at the highest standard. "Despite literally everyone trying to subvert the count and gaslight me into thinking I did not score a 300, I defied all possible expectations and did in fact score a 300 in Nintendo Bowling. Never been done before in Nintendo Bowling. Not ever. Phenomenal job eve

The Babylon Bee

Local News in D.C.
Cover Media
Raw Story
US Magazine
People Shopping
Newsweek Top