TOKYO, JAPAN

The brand new outfit for the 2021 Canadian Olympic Team has been revealed: a pair of dirty Mennonite overalls and shit kicker boots.

“We wanted the team to stand-out from the crowd, so we drove around rural Saskatchewan and– ! the Olympic team uniform was born,” said designer Peter Dick. “I had real difficulty getting Mr. Klassen to give up his overalls, but he agreed once I bribed him with a bit of .”

Dick then spent the rest of the afternoon acquiring hundreds of clothing items at the Hebert MCC store.

“The track team is really looking forward to clomping down the lane in these shit kickers,” said Dick. “And the high jump? Well, they practically fainted with excitement when I showed them the steel toe boots they had to wear.”

Canada’s swim team was also very enthusiasti

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