THERE’S no need to fret if you didn’t get the A-level results you needed. Here top celebrities explain why incredibly talented people like them succeed anyway.

Jeremy Clarkson

“Higher education? Bollocks. Waste of time. If you want to carve out a media career, take it from someone who only got a C and two Us for his A-levels that you don’t need them. Rather than pissing away tens of thousands of pounds on a bit of paper, focus on developing a boorish personality and twattish opinions. They’ll take you further than a degree ever could.”

Alan Sugar

“Alright, listen up. Degrees are the biggest load of toot and will lose you money. Being an entrepreneur doesn’t involve writing an unoriginal essay about Moby Dick . It’s all about finding gaps in the market and filling them with shit p

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