How to Do It is Slate’s sex advice column. Have a question? Send it to Jessica and Rich here . It’s anonymous!
Dear How to Do It,
I’ve known my ex for 55 years, and we were married for 42 of them. We began dating when she was 16 and I was 17.
We had sex the following year, and it was pretty meh; of course, we were only teens. We never had a hot relationship where we would have sex multiple times per day or in crazy places; she just never cared for anything other than straight penis-in-vagina sex. I always felt I was missing something, and during that time, I had multiple affairs.
I finally got busted eight years ago, and she asked for and received a divorce. Now, after eight years apart, we’re seeing each other again, but the sex is the same. I read something recentl