The Animals Who Raised Us

Key points

Animals often step into attachment roles when caregivers can’t.

Early animal bonds can provide somatic safety.

Being loved by an animal changes the brain, increasing oxytocin and decreasing cortisol, among other benefits.

Animals can teach relational clarity and co-regulation.

For many people, the love that carried them through childhood didn’t come from the adults who were supposed to soothe, guide, and protect them. It came padded on four legs, wrapped in fur, breath, or gentle weight. Animals have a remarkable way of stepping into the emotional gaps left by human caregivers—offering steadiness, warmth, and unconditional regard without asking a child to contort themselves into impossible shapes.

How Animals Become Our Safe Haven in Childhood

Children are wired to atta